Don't Let Your Reputation Take You Where Your Character Can't Keep You

Hi there!

There are times when people have a great reputation, but their character is deeply flawed.  Please take a listen to see what I mean.    Thank you so much!!

For questions, comments or other information, you may contact me at:
Email:   coachlisagilbert@gmail.com  or coachlisa@nonontraining.com
Office Phone:  (954) 364-8871   or Cell:  (954) 470-9779





 ** Podcast Disclaimer:  Lisa Gilbert is  the CEO and Founder of No-Nonsense Training Solutions, Inc.  She is a Consultant to Public Safety  and other City and Corporate Entities.  She is an Organizational Solutions Strategist and Expert Training Facilitator and Professional Development Coach.   Coach Lisa is not a Licensed Therapist and any information shared in her Podcasts are for instructional and professional development purposes only.
 
©2022 Copyright No-Nonsense Training Solutions, Inc. 

Please be sure to subscribe to the podcast on all of the major podcast platforms!

For questions, comments or other information, you may contact me at:
Email:   coachlisagilbert@gmail.com  or coachlisa@nonontraining.com
Office Phone:  (954) 364-8871   or Cell:  (954) 470-9779

** Podcast Disclaimer:  Lisa Gilbert is  the CEO and Founder of No-Nonsense Training Solutions, Inc.  She is a Consultant to Public Safety and other City and Corporate Entities.  She is an Organizational Solutions Strategist and Expert Training Facilitator and Professional Development Coach.   Coach Lisa is not a Licensed Therapist and any information shared in her Podcasts are for instructional and professional development purposes only. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:13

Hello, and welcome to No Nonsense Wisdom Wednesday with Coach Lisa, where with every episode I will give you strategies and insight that will make you uncommon on purpose. In this week's episode, let's talk about this. It's when your reputation takes you there, but your character can't keep you there. Yeah, don't let your reputation take you somewhere where your character can't keep you. That's what it's about. All right? You ready? Let's go. You know, a lot of people get recognized, promoted to positions of authority. They get access to opportunities, they start businesses, churches, or other things of importance based solely on their reputation, their skill, and their ability. And listen, that's all good. But when the fire gets hot, when the adversity comes, they get burned, and sometimes it's not in a good way. Why? Because although they had this great reputation, they had some character flaws that were never addressed, never dealt with or confronted. You know, people just let them keep sliding by because they did some things well. But you know, you do people a real disservice when you won't tell them the truth of how they may hurt themselves or hurt others later. You know, for me, it's so disheartening to see so many people get into places of authority because of a great reputation. But underneath it, they have this tainted, warped, big-time character flaw. You know, it's hurtful when people get into relationships, but they can't remain faithful because of a character flaw of unfaithfulness or disloyalty. You know, it's a problem when people can't be in business partnerships with people because of others being deceptive, underhanded, you know, stealing, embezzling money from the company, you know, all that kind of stuff. You know, I'm being nice right now. I'm being nice because it's a podcast, it's going public. But you know, there's a difference, and we need to recognize it. So reputation and character. Let's separate the two. Reputation is defined as the beliefs or opinions that are generally held about someone or something, all right? Reputation is what you're known for, uh, what a person is known for. It may be a brand or something that we've built over time on our accomplishments. It's um based on our network and education. It's the external that we can craft for others to see, and they can recognize us for what we do and for who we say we are. I'm gonna say that again. Reputation is this external image, uh-huh. So reputation is this external image that we've crafted for others to see and for others to recognize, and they recognize what we do, and we want them to recognize us who we say we are. That's important for you to remember. It's an image, it's an image, reputation. But now, character is something different. Character is the internal part of you, it's the deeper part of you. Character is something that is built over time, it's built over your lifetime. And you know, there are people that have good character, there are people with bad character, yeah, and there are people with questionable character. So, so you know what does that mean? People that have no integrity are people that have questionable character, you know. Oh, yeah. Oh, they may be great decision makers for the business and they can cause the business to do real well, but what's their character like? Yeah, yeah. They may have a reputation for being a great leader that can influence others outwardly to get things done, but what is their character like? What is happening when no one is looking? Or how do they move when they believe no one will know or no one will challenge them? You know, listen, they could be great speakers and all this kind of stuff that can get people all motivated, but what is their character like? They could be considered a powerful church leader, but what is their character like? I think that one bothers me most of all. Because when you're supposed to be leading people to God, but then there's a character flaw, we have to really look at it. You know, those with questionable character can seem one way, but when everything hits the fan, another person or another side of them shows up, and the outcome is not good. You know, you find out that that person was not the person you thought they were because everybody was so enamored with them, but they were enamored with an image. Listen to me, they were enamored with a reputation. And questionable characters are those that can really fool you because they've crafted and they've honed such a great image, such a great reputation. You know, and I talk about them a bit in my 10 traits of counterfeit leadership book. And it's called 10 Traits of Counterfeit Leadership, recognize the fake and the phony and the fraudulent, and it's how not to be that kind of leader. And you know, these questionable characters, they're quite charismatic and they're charming. But not only that, they know how to get things done through other people. Their influence is amazing, but it's that character flaw that has not been dealt with. And you know what? If they're not careful, it will come to the front eventually. See, we so you know, we begin to know people's character when ethical moments of truth come to test what's in us. Ethical moments of truth come to test all of us. And you know, ethical moments of truth are this they are those moments that will come to see how you will respond in various situations. Yeah. Ethical moments of truth come to test your integrity, your character, your fortitude to stand right in tough situations. They come to test your faith, they come to test your obedience, your relationships, your loyalty. Everything about you, they come to test. So it's got to be more than an image, it's got to be something deeper that's holding you together. And, you know, and hopefully we have the right character that will help us stand up to the test. You know, it starts at home, it starts in our upbringing, it starts with how we're raising our children. You know, let me tell you, it was a few years ago. Took my granddaughter with me to Publix, and I sent her into the store. I want to see how responsible she's gonna be. And um, so she gets in, she cuts stuff, she comes back, and she hands me the receipt with all this change. So I said, uh, Michaela, this is too much change for this. She said, Well, Mima, that's what the lady gave me. I said, Yes, but did you count it? She said, No. I said, Well, it's too much change and we have to take it back. Well, why do we take it back? Why do we have to take it back? Nobody will know. Right there was an ethical moment of truth. There was a teaching moment that I was gonna give to her right then. And I explained to her because I was a cashier many years ago. Uh, and I told her, I said, because if this young lady's till or her cashier drawer is short, she could get fired. She could get in a lot of trouble. And I noticed it kind of bothered her when I did say that. So I said, So we're gonna go back inside, you're gonna find her, and you're gonna tell her that she gave you too much change. We went back inside and she did it. And you know, I noticed a difference on her. And I explained to her, I said, this is the right thing to do in these situations. Yeah, nobody might not know, or you know, you or you think they won't know, but her till was short and you could have impacted her, all right? So we need to be able to talk about those things. So listen, we've all done things, we've all done things that can cause us to fail or to fall. We we all have it in us that that we could still do it. None of us are immune. However, we must know ourselves well enough to know what we will do and what we won't do, no matter what. You know, there's a quote from my leadership boot camp from a book called The Leadership Challenge, the author's coups and posner. And it says, to act with integrity, you must first know who you are. You can only be authentic when you lead according to principles that matter most to you. Otherwise, you're only putting on an act. I thought that was just so excellent. So in my leadership classes, I stress the need for leaders to be of right character. In my coaching practice with people, I stress the need for people to have right character. You know, we have to be known, be known for the one that will stand for what's right, even when it's hard. You know, it's sad that we're in a time when what's valued is skill and talent over character. What's valued is position over character. It seems to that we value a network over character, but we can't rule out character because when things get tough, the character will show up. When things get tough, your integrity will be challenged. So listen, here's my definition of integrity. And it's when your character and your reputation are constant, consistent, and congruent with each other. They are stable and do not fluctuate based on circumstances. So if you're really gonna succeed and if you're really gonna set a right example, your character and reputation must surely be in sync. Yeah. The character is that integrity that is informed deep inside of you. So listen, you know, it's dangerous when people's reputation takes them to positions and places of power where their character can't keep them. Did you hear what I just said to you? I'm gonna say it again. It can be dangerous when your reputation takes you there, but your character can't keep you there. So uh I see a lot of people with great reputation, but their character is really tainted. You know, so let me tell you a bit about what happens when your reputation takes you a place and your character can't keep you in that place. When your reputation takes you there, but your character can't keep you there, you may wind up enduring some really painful situations that tarnish your reputation forever. Yeah, yeah. When your way when your reputation um takes you there, but your character can't keep you there, you can wind up hurting a lot of people around you that trusted you and looked up to you. You know, you could end up shutting the door on so many opportunities that might have been waiting for you, but your character wasn't strong enough to keep you. You know, you know what? When your reputation gets you somewhere, but your character can't keep you there, you'll find yourself constantly in situations where you have to prove yourself over and over because why? People no longer trust you. They don't trust you. And you know what? You could find yourself losing everything that you worked so hard for. You know, you'll find yourself losing major backing and support and losing relationships. You'll find yourself having to struggle and start over and never get to where you were before. Yeah, yeah. So, you know, when your reputation takes you somewhere, but your character can't keep you there, you may wind up having a major public fall and never get back up. Yeah. You know, you end up losing the influence and ability to make the much needed changes, you know. Hey, no, but those changes were probably really needed, really valid, but your character got you kicked out. And I want to say this the biggest thing, you know, when your reputation takes you somewhere, but your character can't keep you, you could possibly lose your life. You know, listen, listen. I know that's a hard one to hear, but listen to this. There was there's a story a few weeks ago about a corrections deputy uh that helped a dangerous inmate escape. This was a felon, and he was dangerous. Uh, she was trusted, she was well known. This corrections deputy trusted, well known. I believe it was the warden. The warden even said that he would have trusted her with his life. Yeah. And when this happened, it shook everyone. I mean, this woman was on the wrong side with a dangerous fellow. She was on the run with him for over a week. And in the end, she took her own life. Because you know what? She knew she had lost everything. She was at her time of retirement. She could have gone on to do, you know, more with her life because she wasn't an old woman. She had more that she could have done. But you know what? She made a decision. Now, whether he forced her or not, that's not even my concern because much of this had to do with her making some very dangerous, life-changing decisions. This speaks, in my opinion, to her character. Her reputation said that she was trusted. She did her job well. But in the end, her character, which was shown to everyone, shown the decision, it showed us something else about her. Her character flaw caused a very different outcome to take place. Wow. You know, there are so many other incidents I can share, but I think you get my point. You know, right character can protect you, right character will guard you, it will ground you. I want you to take a minute, you know, think about other people you may know in the media or even up close to you. Think about how they were known for this or known for that. But then in that ethical moment of truth, it came. And what they did, their decision, it changed everything forever for them. So, what can we do? Well, let me tell you something real quick. First thing you know, allow other people to always speak right things into you. If people see you going the wrong way or see you have a bent towards something, let them speak to that, let them let them bring correction to you. Yeah, I have people in a circle around me that speak correct things to me, and I'm willing to make those adjustments because you know what? I need people to speak the right things to me, and so do you. Now, you don't need people to agree with you. You don't need people that are not gonna, you know, that are gonna agree with the foolishness. You need people that are gonna help you grow and come into that place of right character. Yeah. Here's another thing. You need to know your value system. You know what's important to you? What things will you fight for? What do you stand for? And you know what? Sometimes that's just when we don't know, we need to know what that is. We need to know that. So, you know, listen, I'm Coach Lisa and I can coach you, I can help you through these tough places right now. I do that. I help people see what they need to see, I can help them hear what they need to hear and cause them to do what they need to do to be better, to be uncommon on purpose. So if this is a place that you're struggling right now, reach out to me. You can email me, coach Lisa, at no non-training.com, or give me a phone call, 954-470-9779. Yes, I answer my own emails and I answer my own phone. So I will talk to you. Yeah, because you know what? You don't want to make any kind of uh mistakes that could cause you to end everything you've worked so hard for. So you listen, let your reputation and character be consistent and constant so that they can stand in the face of adversity. You know, here are here's a few quotes I want to leave with you. And it's a few lines from Mr. William Hersey Davis, and he talks about the differences between reputation and character. Listen to this. He says, reputation is what you're supposed to be, the character is what you are. Reputation is what you have when you come to a new unit. Character is what you have when you go away. Your reputation is learned in an hour. Your character does not come to light for a year. Listen to this. Reputation is what men say about you on your tombstone. Character is what the angels say about you before the throne of God. Did you hear that? There's a difference. All right, I'm done. I'm done. I know that was longer than usual, but that was just something I had to get off me because of so many things I'm seeing. I'm done with it. I want you to be careful. Don't let your reputation take you to a place where your character can't keep you. All right. So as Coach Lisa signing off, please make sure you subscribe to the podcast. Listen, uh, we're on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and Google Podcasts, along with all the other outlets. I can't call all the names. You saw me stumbling over those, but it's Apple, Spotify, and Google along with the others. And you know what? Subscribe and also visit our website, www.no nonsense training solutions.com and check out some of the books we have there. You know, and you know what? And if you'd like to be a part of the uh our mailing list, join me. Info at no nontraining.com. All right. Thank you so much. I'm done again. Now you go and you have an amazing no nonsense day. I'll talk to you next time. Don't let your reputation take you where your character cannot keep you. You heard me? All right. Have a great bye-bye.